Monday, August 10, 2015

For the Christian Widower

Dear Widower,
Occasionally I hear from widowers, and my heart goes out to them because they are a minority often overlooked but their grief is as real as anyone else's. Although there aren't many resources for widowers as compared to those for widows, there are some, so take heart. And always remember that God is on your side. He will never leave you or forsake you. He knows your situation, and there are good plans for your life that he will complete, Phil. 1:6.

Local Grief Group
The first place I'd refer you to is GriefShare, a support group with a DVD curriculum. On the DVD's you'll hear from other widowers, and the general knowledge about grief will not only help you recognize patterns in what you're going through, but will also give you freedom to release it in God's timing and prepare for a hopeful future. Simply type your zipcode in the search box to find a group.

Did you know Christian musician Jeremy Camp was widowed? He has a book, 'I Still Believe' that talks about being widowed in his 20's and his remarriage.
C.S. Lewis was widowed, and wrote "A Grief Observed" which is a peek into the private and at times hopeless examinations of his brilliant mind. No resolution is offered for it's simply his personal journal that he never intended for the public, but it may help put words to things you experience. Identifying those happenings will help you to deal with them. You'll begin to know what to expect in this boxing ring, and find out you're not alone.
H. Norman Wright was widowed, too, and his book about the experience is "Reflections of A Grieving Spouse." He's a Christian counsellor. The more closely you can relate to any of these men--their ages, their circumstances, etc --the more their books might help.

Online there are various pages by widowers/for widowers. Here's a blogger I just found:
Comfort2theMourning This blog is written by a couple who were both widowed before they married each other. There are stand alone pages for widowers.
Also, R.C.Sproul, Jr. a reformed theologian who's wife died in 2011. He wrote about her the following year:

I hope this helps a bit. If you have specific questions about being a widower, I'll do everything I can to help you find some biblical answers. My husband, Tom's first wife died from ovarian cancer when he was 40, leaving him with a 10-year-old son, so he might have some good things to share with you too. Email him at too. ferree

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