Thursday, July 28, 2016

R and R: Rest and Reading for Widows and Those Who Love Them

photo by Lisa Bowman
It looks like another hot weekend for most of us, so I hope you'll be able to stay cool and rested. Rest is so important, especially during grief. If sleep doesn't come easily please see your doctor. Adjusting to widowhood is stressful so don't feel guilty if you find that concentrating is difficult, forgetfulness is all-too-present, and that you easily lose track of time. Those things mean you need to practice the fine art of doing nothing so your body and brain can calm down.

Next week I'll mention some good books to help along this journey. But if you're looking for something to read and relax with today, I have 2 suggestions.

Remember when I spoke to the widows' group in Wenatchee, WA? My daughter Lisa came along with me, and if you visit her blog you'll read her perspective and see more gorgeous photos. Other widows who've seen it have really enjoyed getting to know her (and her view of me, I say cautiously), and I think you will too. Click here for Lisa's blog, The Seagull's Almanac.

On another note, I'm sure you've probably heard some real bloopers when it comes to how people responded to you at the funeral and beyond, right? Apparently widows aren't the only ones taking the brunt of foot-in-mouth disease. Here's a piece with a great little tool to help us all: How Not to Say the Wrong Thing in Death, Illness, Divorce, and Other Crises

Remember to rest this weekend, and I'll look forward to catching up with you again next week.

Tuesday, July 26, 2016

This Summer vs. Last Summer: Life Changes!

This summer: 9330 miles travelled in less than 2 months! Very little back pain.

Last summer: I went no where except for trips to the doctor, to the MRI center, to a physical therapist and a medical massage therapist. Chronic back pain. Plus the realization that I'd hit people with my cane or run them over with my wheel chair if I had either of those. I now admire my disabled friends even more for their grace under pressure.

So this summer I'm making up for lost time. Lest you picture me relaxing on a cruise, please note that all but 676 of the miles were to visit family I only see once or twice a year (or not at all if it's like last summer). The 676 miles were to and from Montrose Christian Writers Conference in Montrose, Pennsylvania.

Why did I go to a writers conference? Will I write a new book?

I don't know. All I know is that I desperately wanted to go to this conference, this year. And now I know I'm glad I did!

In the next week or two you'll see some cool things I learned about improving this blog and my writing. Maybe you'll see another book from me in a few years if I can package up my idea and send it to the agent I talked to at the conference-- woot woot!

You'll definitely see two wonderful widowed writing friends I met. I'm excited to tell you about their books, their websites and some other good resources.

But for now, let's stop and smell the roses.
Ooops, these are not roses,
and I see a few weeds too.
Such is life.
They're still pretty though, yes? 
Please tell me how your summer is going, OK? I have to pick a ton of tomatoes today while it's still only 85 hot, muggy degrees. I hope you are staying cool in this heatwave.

And take hope from my example that next summer can be much better. Click the comment line or email me at WCplace@gmailcom. I love hearing from you.


Monday, July 18, 2016

Spending Christmas Alone? This Would Be So Much Better...

Do You Ever Wonder...
by Beth in NC

Do You Ever Wonder...
what widows do when we get together?


laugh and cry,

act silly and get serious,

share and listen,

talk and have silence,

eat and EAT,

give a shoulder to lean on and lean on that shoulder,

comfort and are comforted,

love on and get loved on.

We are bonded by our circumstance and blessed by our friendship.

We need not pretend with each other because we "get it"!
Beth continued with this: