2 yrs. Already...
Exactly two years ago right now I was still a wife...for about another hour. It's amazing how quickly time passes. I got up that Thursday morning excited to be going on a field trip with fourth graders...life went from excitement to devastation with one phone call.
What is it about "dates"? For the longest time EVERY 29th of EVERY month, I would think to myself...it's been X amount of months since I have seen Mike, heard his voice, and so on. Dates are hard to get "past". I don't think about the 29th coming around every month anymore...only on April 29. Forever this day will be a special one for us.
Today marks a huge milestone...our youngest daughter had just turned 2 (6 days before Mike died) and this past week she had a birthday, the big 4! For me when I look back, she has lived half her life WITH daddy and half her life WITHOUT him. This is the kind of thing that hurts me...for her not to remember much at all about him. Of course, we all talk about him, but she has no idea how much she was loved and what she missed. She never will...love is not a word we can describe to her about how her daddy felt about her. She hasn't really "known" the relationship between a daddy and his daughter.
The girls and I will head to the cemetery this morning before church, put out new flowers and place a new angel by the stone. We won't be mournful today, although we may have a tear now and then. But, we will be celebrating the day daddy met Jesus and not the "day" we lost him. Because of God's promise of eternal life, we WILL see him again. We will be going to the zoo today celebrating daddy's big day. He loved taking the girls to the zoo. (I think he liked it better than they did!) I feel like we have to continue to "live the legacy". We will have a great day.
I will find myself going back to April 29, 2010, and how that day unfolded and changed our lives forever. I think it's the "human" in me...but, I will not get caught up in the "poor me" of it all. I have great support of family and friends who have gotten me through and today will be no different. I praise God for each and every one of them...
Ecclesiastes 3:4 A time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to heal...© 2012 by Carrie Jo Kistler Shride. Used by permission. Visit Carrie's blog, Finding JOY In Our JOurneY and view the original post and comments here: http://www.findingjoynrjourney.blogspot.com/2012/04/where-to-sit-in-church.html