Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Fathering Our Children: Who's Job Is It Anyway? Part 1

My widow friend Joann shared with her Going Ashore group some new things the Lord is helping her understand about parenting. It stirred up a great conversation with the group so I asked her if I could use it here too. Add your feedback in the comment box, or if you have personal notes for Joann, please email me at and I'll pass them along to her. Please visit tomorrow for Part 2.

As some of you know, I attended our state home school convention recently. It's a wonderful time that I look forward to each year. Although I was working one of the booths part of the time I still was so encouraged and blessed. Even amongst all the "happy whole families"!! (now there's a praise!!)

Anyway, there were a couple of workshops I wanted to attend, one aimed at raising sons, one for daughters. Since the speaker who was doing the workshops has a ministry called Family Man, and I know that his purpose is to get father's involved, I asked him beforehand if the focus of the talks would be aimed at dads or parenting in general. I explained that as a widow, it can be discouraging to sit and hear how the father's role is so vital.

He looked straight at me and said "God promises to be a father to the fatherless and I think you need to claim that and believe that promise."

Wow!!! I had never really looked at it that way. I am not one to "claim" things but the way I took it is to own that promise from Psalm 68:5. God does not say things lightly; therefore I need to take it seriously!

I thanked him and told him that he was right, but it was hard when after 4 years no man in our family or friends has stepped up to spend time with my son. He gently reminded me that God could fill those gaps, all I have to do is ask.

And you know what? That man was right!

say that God is father to my children but then I wear myself out trying to do it all. Oh me of little faith! (Or is it me of big pride?)

How can I possibly expect to measure up and compare what I can do, to what Ephesians 3:20 tells me that God can do?  “Now unto Him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us.”   

I can think of alot that my kids need, but God can do “exceeding abundantly” more than that! I need to also remember why He not only can do all this but will do all this; it is stated in the very next verse. “Unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen.” (Eph. 3:21)

I am beginning to understand that I need to get out of the way so that God can do His thing.   I also need to remember that when God does need me to be a part of His plan, He will enable me---“He shall feed his flock like a shepherd: he shall gather the lambs with his arm, and carry them in his bosom, and shall gently lead those that are with young.” (Isaiah 40:11)

I am still praying through how to walk this but I feel like so many of us can benefit from this shift in thinking! --Joann B.

How would a shift in thinking benefit you? I'd love to hear your thoughts! And I want to say a special "thank you" to Joann for sharing this learning experience with us today. You'll be equally challenged tomorrow when you hear "the rest of the story..."


  1. Wow I love this!! And actually needed this today because I have been struggling with this also and what a way to look at this. Thank you for sharing this. I get in the way all the time, now I need to step back and pray and have faith. I have a 13 year old daughter that is heavily involved with sports and I try not to be a "soccer mom" that I am but it's hard so hard. Thank you!!! Love it!!!

  2. One thing amazing about posting here is seeing how God's timing is perfect! I didn't know you needed this, but He did! Thanks for sharing your reaction, Soccer Mom. (As long as you're not trying to be Soccer Dad I'll bet you're doing it pretty well!) Hang in there!

  3. LOL...yeah it's hard not being both. But we are working through it and it will be fine...its just getting through each day!!! Thank you Ferree!!


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