Read Ruth 3:6-7
Let’s face it: At some point, you’ll probably think of dating again. Maybe you’ve reached that point already. But what will happen if you do? Television shows, movies, magazine articles, and books want you to believe that casual sex between consenting adults is acceptable—even sensible if you’re thinking about marrying the person, something like test-driving a car. This is the bed-hopping philosophy our pop culture pushes. . . Virgins are oddities and even scorned and mocked. And, the world tells us, certainly a grown woman, sexually mature and experienced, has needs and urges and the right to see them satisfied, right? Are you ready to step into this world of moral dilemma and sexual compromise?
Naomi, Ruth, and Boaz show us ways to avoid sexual temptation. They are fine examples of a higher calling: protecting virtue.
When we choose to look out for the other person, to love and respect them so much that protecting their virtue and reputation is more important than fulfilling our own needs and lusts, we can avoid sexual sin. . .
DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
It’s never too early in widowhood to consider motives and set some safeguards into your lifestyle that will encourage personal righteousness and protect virtue in dating. Examine your heart motive for dating. Pray honestly to God about it. Remember that looking to a person to meet spiritual needs that only God can meet is like idolatry.
Consider safe ways to meet good men. Will you depend on mutual friends and co-workers, church groups, or community groups for introductions? Will you try Internet single sites, social networking, or chat rooms? Will job travels or vacations introduce you to men?
Enforce these boundaries:
- Remain relatively anonymous on the Internet. Don’t post your phone number, address, full name, or even the specific city you live in.
- Enjoy the security of group dates when you are just getting to know someone.
- Always let someone know when you have a date. Give them details of time, place, and activity. Accountability is good for your conscience and your safety.
- Avoid overnight situations.
- Respect your friends’ and family’s opinions about your date. They can see things you can’t.
PRAYER
Dear God,
I don’t want to hide anything from you, but there are only so many cold showers I can take! Show me how to be righteous, loving, and pleasing to you and to keep your commandments as my highest authority. At the same time, open me up to love and wonder. Amen.
(excerpts from Postcards From The Widows' Path, pages 159, 163, 164)
You have just the right advice and way of saying it! Thank you for sharing the wisdom you have gleaned along the way.
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