Thursday, January 24, 2013

Widows Transform Valentines Day

Shearon:  We've talked about Valentine's Day coming next month, and how tough it is to see flowers, candy and etc. in the stores! It's such a tender time for a widow's heart. I never really thought about this before widowhood landed on my doorstep! How about you? Last year...some ladies in Lifeboat talked about different ways they reached out to others on Feb 14th. It was almost like turning the inside out. They shared some unique sparkles they handed out that day.

Teresa:  The first year a friend handed each of us a miniature rose plant....loved it!

Andrea:  Any holiday is tough because it is always a reminder that we are not with the one we love. I would love to hear suggestions of what we can do that day to reach out to others, perhaps by doing for someone else we can ease some of our pain.

Candy:  It is a hard holiday for me. Last year I bought 2 beautiful flower arrangements and took them out to the nursing home where my parents passed from this world to the next. I put one on the desk of the social worker and then asked a nurse in the hall if she knew of some lady that would appreciate some flowers on that day. She immediately knew who to give them to. I may do the same thing this year on Valentine's Day.

Shearon: Great idea Candy! Last year I took a small balloon arrangement & candy to a young cashier girl at a local store. She was having a difficult time in life. She was soooo excited, and said that she had never received a Valentine present before. I was on such a spiritual high that day!! I felt very blessed! I'm thinking about blessing a new widow or two this year. Keep the ideas coming....

Candy: I forgot to say that I also had flowers delivered to my two out-of-state daughters, and then I hand delivered flowers to my two daughters who live nearby.......from their dad. They were so surprised and loved them.

Colleen:  I like the ideas and it's a new way to look at it. Two years ago, on my first Valentine's Day without my hubby (he passed away suddenly just 2 1/2 weeks before), a dear friend showed up at my house with a redbud tree for my yard. Her husband & boys returned that weekend and planted it. It was a special gift I will always treasure.

Sandra: I have a teenage friend who loves stuffed animals so I'm going to give her a cute little animal and some flowers. She's one of the most beautiful teenage girls I know because she just radiates the love of Christ!

Shearon: Sandra, such a great idea!!! You will be blessed by blessing her.

Teresa: Yes, by all means!

Linda: Not sure what I will do yet but something is brewing in my mind about something for the kids I work with - outwardly it will be something from me - but inwardly it will be a gift to them from Jesus - so I am waiting His specific directions.

Linda: I am also thinking about something "anonymous" for my co-workers. I just love doing things "on the sly"!

TSB: I sent cards with scripture encouragement to all the widowed friends in my circle of friends.

Carrie: You all have given me a lot of great ideas. For the Wed 13th I can take kids from church to the nursing home and see if its ok to hand out flowers to the ladies. Any idea as to what to hand out to the men residents? On Valentines I can have flowers delivered to the two new widow ladies I go to church with or take them out to eat if they feel up to it. Thanks for the ideas.

Candy: Men ALWAYS love something sweet, Carrie. Food is their love language. My dad always asked us to bring him something sweet when he was in the nursing home. Maybe you could give them each a candy bar.

Shearon: Carrie, such wonderful ideas for the Valentine holiday! Candy's idea for candy (ha, ha) is a good idea. You can also put candy wrapper sleeves on the candy bars - with the church info on it. You can also take a lunch to the widows, if they don't feel like getting out. Food and fellowship! Can't get much better. Blessings...
Dear Reader, This conversation was from one of my private Facebook support groups for widows last week, and I asked their permission to copy it here for you. I wanted to show you some ways God works through us in the midst of grief. If you'd like to find out more about my groups, please check out this link. And feel free to continue this conversation by adding your own comments today. Everyone would love to hear from you.


  1. Hi Ferree
    My husband passed away just about a month before Valentines day. My daughter's friends mother passed away just a couple of days before Glenn. So that very first year I sent bouquets to both my daughter - from her dad, and one to Meagan - from her mom. Both loved them. Last year I had come across a couple of ideas and put them together. Mt theme was God's love and in particular his light. For each of my children and their families I made up 14 bags going from Feb. 1st to 14th. I made up instructions on what I wanted them to do that day to show Gods light. Some ideas were make a valetine's day card for someone special, one day it was kazoos and tiny drums to make a joyful noise by making up a song about God's light. I also put a goodie in for each day as well as a homemade "fortune cookie" made out of felt in which I put either a thought about God, a simple thought i.e. Grandmom loves you, or an inspirational thought. They loved it and are looking forward to this years adventure. I am going to use how Jesus served others this year.

  2. Hi Jean, Thank you for sharing these great ideas! I'm sure others will really enjoy them and be inspired to let themselves have some fun and spread some love. Especially with kids and grandkids, but the rest of us "kids" at heart enjoy it too. :)

  3. Everyone has such wonderful and inspirational ideas to reach out and help others as they themselves work to get through a difficult day...

    I know it's a day that will reminds us that we are not with the one we love...and that is sad.....but it's also a day to remind us of how much love we shared with them and that love will always be with us.

    My heart goes out to all of you. <3

  4. (I tried to put a reply on todays valentine story but my phone won't let me.) I wanted to share my Valentine's day plan. My husband Joe had treatment at Tenneessee Oncology off and on for 7 years. He died 4 months ago so this is my first Valentine's day without him. I will take a special music box card he gave me many years ago and enjoy hearing it play and read what he wrote in the card one more time. It is a sweet memory. Each week our church fills 2 baskets with snacks in the waiting room of the oncology office for family and friends waiting on loved ones having treatment. I have made up a special basket filled with Suzy Zoo Valentine cards with a candy treat to set in the waiting room so anyone that has to have treatments the week of Valentines day can have a special treat. Treatments are hard any time but on this special day they can use a little extra love.


Thank you for taking the time to comment. I am not always able to reply but your remarks mean a lot to me and will appear as soon as possible.

Here are some tips for commenting:
Remember to click the Publish button when you are done.
Choosing the anonymous identity is easiest if you do not have your own blog.
Using a computer rather than a cell phone seems to work better. Thanks again!