Monday, February 16, 2015

How This Blog Started 5 Years Ago

Dear Reader,

Here's the post that started this blog five ago. It's been a sacred privilege ever since to meet many widows, hear their amazing stories and see how the Lord sustains and encourages them through the dark days of grief. But the best part is the privilege of seeing how they learn that in Christ their grief gradually transforms to growth, and hope, and a sense of joy. They learn that peace and pain can co-exist. When God is their strength, gratitude can overcome grief. It's an amazing transformation and I am so blessed see it!

So please bear with me as I rewind this first post to consider how great God is, to honor my husband Bruce, and to commemorate this day. I told a friend yesterday that it doesn't hurt anymore, and I don't dwell on my loss, but I can never forget. I wouldn't want to forget, would you? Just as God told his people Israel to set up memorial stones on thier journey, this is my memorial.

Thank you for your kind thoughts and prayers today, and thank you for your part in the life of this blog, my book, and the groups on Facebook. Most of all I thank my Savior Jesus Christ who makes all things new.

The Day Life Changed Forever
(originally posted Feb. 15, 2010)

Ten years ago this very day I woke up thinking it'd be like any other day, but I was a widow by suppertime. It's hard to believe it's been ten years. On one hand it seems like only yesterday, on the other it's like another lifetime. I was in the kitchen making a salad for supper.

"When's dinner?" Bruce asked.
Here's a "before" picture with me, the dog,
and Bruce on the top step.
Brooke, Brad and Lisa in front of us.
I told him we could have it whenever he wanted. We checked the time, talked about the schedule for the rest of the day, and decided he had time for a little weight-lifting workout downstairs. He gave me a hug--a deep, send-my-soul-to-the-stars sort of hug. It wrapped around eternity and intertwined pretty colors, sparkles and spirals all around me. I loved my husband, my kids, my life . . .

He went down to the basement, I heard a strange yell from him a few minutes later. I found him laying down on the floor--thought he was playing a joke on me.

But it wasn't a joke. My kids called 911, the squad came, the police came. They sent us upstairs. Carried Bruce out on a stretcher . . . a doctor met us in that "Quiet Room" at the hospital. (Don't ever go in there). And days later the autopsy showed a brain anuerism.

Life changed forever that day. Widowhood was nothing like I expected. The pain was so deep it was frightening; and then it went deeper still, to a place where tears watered tiny, dried up seeds of joy and strength. They grow well in the dark. You can't see them at first, can't imagine they'll ever appear . . .

That's what we'll talk about in this blog. The day it happened for you, the darkness, the seeds of faith that look pretty measly, the strength, and finally the joy. Plus the practical, the realities, the help . . .

Welcome to Widows Christian Place!


  1. Thank you, Ferree, for using your loss to help others in His kingdom. You are a blessing and encouragement to all of us.

  2. Thank you Sharon, I praise the Lord for you and the many ways you share God's love and encouragement through your book and blog.

  3. Thank you, Ferre, for your ministry to widows, and for the lifeboats. It has been a true source of encouragement for me. I enjoyed getting together with you last spring, and getting to know you a bit. God bless you and your family. Teri

  4. Yes, thank you dear sister! You have truly been a blessing to me!

  5. I thank you too, dear Ferree, for starting this blog, as your posts have been a blessing to me also.

    May God's continued blessings be on you as you encourage widows in all stages of this journey.


  6. Eventhough I am so very sorry for your loss, I am ever so Thankful that the Lord directed you to use your loss in such a way to help us all. . .

  7. I add my 'thank you' too. It's been four years for me and the loss doesn't hurt nearly as much as it did. You have been such a blessing! Your blog has been like a guidebook of how to do this...

  8. Me too Ferree - I feel each and every word above stated -

    Love to you and every widow and widower on this unsolicited journey -

    Blessings, Love and Hugs xoxo Dodi

  9. I have been so blessed from the first time I found your blog almost 2-1/2 years ago after losing my husband (undoubtedly late one night when I couldn't sleep). I have always found your advice to be sound, practical, and Christ-centered - with no "spotlight" or attention on yourself. Many widows' personal blogs that I found while searching in those early days seemed to stop the moment they started dating or entered into marriage again. I so appreciate that you continued and that you are always so respectful about each widow's path in that area. You have never equated remarriage with the "cure" to being widowed, as many seem to directly or indirectly do (I also appreciate your current husband - as he must be vey supportive and respectful of the time you dedicate to this blog). You also seem so generous with your time! By arranging different get togethers as you have traveled and even throwing out the idea one time of a get together in your hometown ..... You really have a heart for meeting and fellowship and support of one another - and with no intent or goal of charging for seminars or conferences to do so - which is so appreciated. So sorry for the long note. I've never commented on your blog and don't do Facebook, but I just wanted you to know you are apprecIated! Thanks for all the work and prayer you put into this!

  10. A heartfelt thank you for each of these comments, and the last one from anonymous---she knows me well! It's very special to me when people realize what goes on behind the scenes here, and that they know that I really could not do this without the generosity and support of my husband Tom. He loves that I can be here for you and encourage you in the Lord. He prays for us all!


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