Friday, November 14, 2014

Three Essentials for Your Journey Through Grief

(---continued from yesterday)

I wish someone would have told me what to pack for this detour!

But I did have a good start because I knew I had a RELATIONSHIP WITH JESUS CHRIST, first and foremost. The word "widow" wasn’t my total identity. Sure I was a widow, but I was also a child of God. This didn’t mean life would be easy, but Jesus had said, “Blessed are they who mourn for they shall be comforted,” and I took that as a promise.
I knew God was sovereign and in control. I was safe and secure because this was not a surprise for God. He’s numbered our days---all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. Both Bruce’s days and my own —Ps. 139:16
I had RESOURCES available. I didn’t know how to get online back then, and if I had, there just wasn’t much out there for widows. But I had role models flit in and out of my life---in fact I heard from one the very first day. Nancy, a young widow from one of our former churches 200 miles away was the first one to phone me that day. (Isn’t is amazing how the church grapevine works?) Nancy and I used to car-pool our kids together for school, and Bruce and I attended her husband’s funeral.  “You can do this,” she said. And that’s what I needed to hear, and she’s the one I needed to hear it from.
Miriam Neff says, “No one can understand a widow like another widow.” How true! God sent me many other role models. Some were in books I read, one was from my family tree, and some of them were negative models too---I didn’t want to turn out like them! But see? Nancy was calling out to me about what was ahead on this obstacle course called widowhood.
Finally, I found out the hard way that widows need a bag full of REST. On some days you just have to shut down and practice the fine art of doing nothing.  Grief is exhausting, most widows feel like they’ve been cut in half—it’s traumatic! And it takes a while to get back on your feet. That's why every Saturday I harp about Rest, Rest, Rest. It’s essential and you’ve got to allow for it. Trying to power through grief is not going to get you through it any faster. It is what it is and will take as long as it takes. 

So be certain of your Relationship with Jesus Christ---have you placed your faith in Him? Do you know you're a child of God, saved by His death on the cross and not your own baptism, communion or good works? Email me today if you're not sure.
Use your Resources---watch for role models, read about grief and widowhood, and find support people.
Finally, be sure to REST in the Lord… Don’t compare your life to anyone else's, things have changed and the adjustments are huge and draining so rest---physical, emotional and spiritual---is needed. Contrary to some who say “You will grieve forever”---the good news is that the grieving doesn’t have to last forever if you pack your bag with these things.
Check back here tomorrow because I have a wonderful music video that will provide some Rest for you. And then on Monday we'll hit the trail. It starts out pretty rough so watch your step, but you'll be able to see how far you've already come. ferree


  1. I am new at this and appreciate your support very much ��

  2. Hi Sherry, I'm so sorry for your loss and to meet you under these circumstances, but that's what I'm here for and it's an honor to provide this resource for you and others like you. You're all my heroes because I know the courage it takes to get through this. And I also know the faithfulness and love of God and the wonderful sufficiency of His Word and that He will see you through. It's an amazing journey. <3


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