Monday, January 28, 2013

How Long Does It Take?

How long have you been widowed? Days? Weeks? Months? Years?

At first it seems like you cry non-stop and you never expected it to hurt like this! Like you're flooded. You didn't know you had so many tears. Then you might get a repreive. You only cry a couple times a day. After a week or two, a couple times a week.
Sooner or later--there is no schedule, each goes at her own pace--the crying gets down to a couple times a month . . . a couple times a year . . . These crying jags are like labor pains in reverse. While labor pains start out mild and far apart, grief starts out painful, fast, and intense. The next round of "grief pains" are a few seconds shorter, a little further apart. They still hit, but most of the time each new round is a bit diminished; they are a little weaker. Or perhaps you're a little stronger. Brace yourself for birthdays, holidays and anniversary pains. Like labor pains, you know they'll come. Prepare for the wave. But these, too, will become easier to bear.

If the "Grief pains" have done their job well, like birth contractions, something new has been born. When the tears diminish, don't think it's because they've dried up or you've become numb and indifferent. Tears have watered you like raindrops, and you've grown and transformed into the resilient, fruitful orchard of a woman that God had planned all along.
When we look at an apple, we see a piece of fruit with seeds. When God looks at an apple, He sees an orchard. I heard that the other day. It's true, isn't it? I think God sees an orchard when He looks at widows, too.

You might think He sees just an ordinary woman, but I think He sees the real you--the courage, resiliance, and faith. God also sees the legacy of blessing--the seeds--you'll leave for future generations by the choices you make today. There is a lot more "fruit" to be produced in your life, and many more "trees" to grow which will provide the shade of God's goodness to the world because of you. What sort of plans do you think God has in store for you?

Keep me as the apple of your eye; hide me in the shadow of your wings.
Psalm 17:8 (English Standard Version)

5 comments:

  1. Right now I don't have a clue - but I know He's not done with me yet!

    ReplyDelete
  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  3. This post is great! I love your connotation to our transformation into a resilient, fruitful orchard. That is very precious. I have a plaque in my kitchen that says... Only God knows how many apples are in a seed.
    I truly want to leave a good "legacy of blessings" to my future generation. Thank you

    ReplyDelete
  4. What beautiful imagery! Thank you for making my day <3

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for taking the time to comment. I am not always able to reply but your remarks mean a lot to me and will appear as soon as possible.

Here are some tips for commenting:
Remember to click the Publish button when you are done.
Choosing the anonymous identity is easiest if you do not have your own blog.
Using a computer rather than a cell phone seems to work better. Thanks again!