tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3382629264175127167.post6921133719691563430..comments2024-03-25T05:22:40.086-04:00Comments on Widow’s Christian Place: A Widow Asks, "Am I The Only One . . .?"Ferree Bowman Hardyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10739485535852107104noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3382629264175127167.post-46308551233517255102010-06-23T22:17:25.329-04:002010-06-23T22:17:25.329-04:00Ferree, 1 Thessalonians 4:13-14 is on my husband&#...Ferree, 1 Thessalonians 4:13-14 is on my husband's head marker! It's one of my favorite verses.Bridgetthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12055733288782301503noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3382629264175127167.post-74933459358721927042010-06-21T23:36:50.249-04:002010-06-21T23:36:50.249-04:00Wow! Thank you all so much for your input!
I do b...Wow! Thank you all so much for your input!<br /><br />I do believe with all my heart that our Lord aches when we ache, and can give us immeasurable strength when we need it. <br /><br />I do have to reply to MaryLou, though - I agree, those people who told you they were angry at your husband - I think that comment takes the "What were they thinking??" prize. I am sorry you had to hear that. I do love your "Accepted in the Beloved"! We are, and He Is.<br /><br />Thank you all for your comments!Kelly C.https://www.blogger.com/profile/03980257184558215962noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3382629264175127167.post-52891311110480024972010-06-21T23:09:19.666-04:002010-06-21T23:09:19.666-04:00These comments remind me of the words in I Thess. ...These comments remind me of the words in I Thess. 4:13--we don't grieve like those who have no hope. In spite of the sadness and pain you all have made it crystal clear that Christ gives you help and hope!Ferree Bowman Hardyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10739485535852107104noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3382629264175127167.post-48767453035653846442010-06-21T15:12:22.581-04:002010-06-21T15:12:22.581-04:00I find that people without faith or without a stro...I find that people without faith or without a strong faith in the Lord grieve in this way. They can get really stuck in their anger. I participated in an online chat last week, and I had to leave because it was so negative. My Grief Share group isn't like that so I was really surprised. I don't want to be bitter and angry, so I try to avoid people who are grieving in that way. I'm not judging them, just making a choice for my own self-preservation. I had to do the same thing when my husband and I were dealing with infertility. Lots of women become very angry and bitter about their infertility and they are easily offended by fertile women and couples. I did not want to be that way.<br /><br />I look around me and I see that so many are touched by loss already, and if not now they will be one day. I look toward the promises God has given us for an Eternity spent with Him and our saved loved ones, and I'm excited about that. Our God is a God of redemption. He's going to more than make up for my heartache in this life when I arrive on the other side, and I praise Him for that!Joannahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17152737939303560896noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3382629264175127167.post-65056567076423026992010-06-21T14:47:45.012-04:002010-06-21T14:47:45.012-04:00I wasn't ever angry either, just sad. Sad that...I wasn't ever angry either, just sad. Sad that the girls would grow up without their dad and that I would be making all the decisions on my own. My faith in God helped so much - knowing that He is there to support me and love me even when I feel alone. He did speak to me that night that my husband died. He told me not to worry that everything would be alright. It has been.Myra Hnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3382629264175127167.post-66616111071763754052010-06-21T13:42:15.197-04:002010-06-21T13:42:15.197-04:00I have not had to deal with the "anger" ...I have not had to deal with the "anger" issue either. I am 2 1/2 years out in this "journey". Everyone said I would be so angry at my husband but he was sick and how can you be angry at that?! I think people feel they MUST say SOMETHING but I have learned that those who just let me talk and were loving "listeners" were what I needed the most.<br /><br />MaryLouMaryLouhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17821172137607474528noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3382629264175127167.post-84760960686908527942010-06-21T13:35:17.998-04:002010-06-21T13:35:17.998-04:00In my own experience of grieving (husband's su...In my own experience of grieving (husband's suicide) the best thing you can say is, "I am so sorry." and "I love you". I had a few people tell me they were so angry at my husband which did NOT help ME! I am not saying they shouldn't feel that emotion, just that it was deeply hurtful for ME to hear. Keep those things to yourself and just say, "I love you!", and "I am so sorry!" Save all the platitudes because we already know them. A good hug is healing too!<br /><br />Accepted in the Beloved,<br />MaryLouMaryLouhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17821172137607474528noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3382629264175127167.post-52423822954397354322010-06-21T11:23:53.773-04:002010-06-21T11:23:53.773-04:00I'm not angry that my husband died, but I'...I'm not angry that my husband died, but I'm definitely frustrated with widowhood and single parenting. It's hard on many levels without him. I miss him and our life. I'm just sad.Bridgetthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12055733288782301503noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3382629264175127167.post-30005648015588461522010-06-21T08:40:20.537-04:002010-06-21T08:40:20.537-04:00I often wondered, "When will I get to the ...I often wondered, "When will I get to the 'angry stage,' or "Is it OK to be OK with this?" Of course there were times when I crumpled, but as those times got spaced further and further apart I wondered if I was normal or hard-hearted or emotionally repressed. This is something we learn as we go along. We need feedback, and it's good to compare notes.Ferree Bowman Hardyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10739485535852107104noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3382629264175127167.post-5225949696958440982010-06-21T08:25:07.248-04:002010-06-21T08:25:07.248-04:00To tell you the truth, knowing the original poem w...To tell you the truth, knowing the original poem was about the death of a child changes my attitude a bit towards the poet. I cannot fathom losing a child. A local woman lost her child to a drunk driver last year and she has said publicly she can never forgive the driver and spends her days angry and in tears.<br /><br />That being said, the comments following the poem on the other site actually prompted my questions - the widows were saying varying versions of "right on!" or "I'm sending this to people so they'll know how I feel". and "I'm reposting this on MySpace/Facebook so maybe people will think before they speak". Those comments are what made me think about my own feelings, which led me to write Ferree.Kelly C.https://www.blogger.com/profile/03980257184558215962noreply@blogger.com